Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Looking forward?
We are going on a spontanteous cruise in a few short weeks... We love to cruise... but I thought I would be a little farther along in my journey by the next time. My mind's eye sees me feeling comfortable walking around the ship in my bathing suit back to my room to change, and although I haven't really been body concious before my surgery... I find myself very body concious now. I am 113 pounds thinner than I was pre-band... but my mind is open to how I looked then.... and is not happy with how I look now. Maybe it is a Mental block thing that didn't let me see myself quite as big as I was but that block is gone... way gone. And now I see it all, and I am totally Flabulous! Anyway, These are the thoughts that are flopping around in my head most days... I have done well but I know I could do better, much better. I watch that new show Heavy... and it is taking my whole sense of self on a journey. They all struggle with food issues, laziness, depression, bad body images, and the overwhelming road ahead of them... I was there but did I take all the right turns to get here... or did I take the toll roads to save myself some work. I feel like I don't work out enough and I need to get going with strength training to enhance my weight loss and maximize my results. This road has been difficult so far and I think I was convinced that because I started at a much higher weight than most... that I would lose weight faster and easier... for a while. My doctor told me that even though I started at such a high weight... I would still only lose about 2 pounds a week and I should be happy with that and any extra weight lost is a bonus. Am I trying to convince myself that I should be happy with my progress as it is? Or get off my lazy Less-Fat ass and get to the Gym?
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I definitely think you should be happy with the rate of loss you are at! You are averaging over 10 pounds a month which is beyond fantastic. But if you feel you are not exercising as much as you could be, there is no harm in upping that. Don't get down on yourself!
ReplyDeleteMaria, you've done an amazing job so far! And I know you'll continue to greatness! Sure, weight training would help -- it's good for us women for all kinds of reasons. I do think you should be happy with your progress. Our journeys are all so different -- and who cares if you took a toll road here or there. Sometimes we need a little easy patch to get us through. I'm rooting for you!
ReplyDeleteI think you've done amazingly well, you have to feel better with 113 pounds gone, celebrate that!
ReplyDeleteI'm proud of you. You've done all that and you've continued to travel and enjoy your life!
It is so hard to not be self-conscious about our bodies. But you are such a beautiful lady, I hate to know that you feel bad about yourself. You don't deserve that.
ReplyDeleteWorking out? I haven't started yet, but I bought a Zumba workout for Wii. It looks like fun, but I am afraid to start it for some reason. I need to push through that and just do it.
I couldn't get past cruise. I'm so excited for you. You are doing great. A lot of us struggle with exercise, but remember that it's not only going to help your weight loss, but it will help you tone as well.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing amazing! And you know what everyone else is thinking about in their bathing suits - they're all secretly wondering if everyone else is thinking about their bodies!
ReplyDeleteIf you think you should do some strength training, then go for it, lady. :) You're in "good" company now, because I'm in the "I need to workout more" stage myself, but I haven't done much to change that.
Maybe we should be like Ms. M and make a workout 4 days a week challenge? I do so love a good challenge, don't you? :)
you have done an amazing job for sure ! exercise is important but all of us who have alot to loose are going to have to deal with loose skin etc - and I understand what you are saying about being harder on yourself now as you are going down, down - I am noticing more faults in my body nowtoo but that's because I refused to look at myself when I was heavier .
ReplyDelete113 lbs. means a lot of loose skin. I know because I've lost 104 lbs. In some ways I think the loose skin looks worse without the fat to keep it in place. Now the skin just wobbles and hangs there, at least on me. I'm thinking this may be a part of what you're experiencing.
ReplyDeleteBUT...A CRUISE!!! Do you know there are people (like me) who've never been on a cruise and who can't afford vacations. So please, enjoy yourself!