Banded Bullets.... and other crapola.

Well, I was thinking about some things that have changed since I was banded... while I was at a my first Philly Support Group with an Renewed high school friend....

• I feel less stressed about losing weight... I just take it as it comes and week it when it doesn't.



• I eat more fish, I love it actually... but I wasn't crazy about fish pre-band.



• I fart alot more, much more... I guess it's my "healthier" diet, but they usually don't smell much so I just accept it and hide in a corner now and then.



• I crave things that I never really liked before... like French toast and mashed potatoes... Weird, right?



• I think my food decisions through more... I count calories, carbs, and fat but my life doesn't revolve around it, I just like being informed.



• I really enjoy working out at the gym... It gives me a feeling of accomplishment.



• I wear my war wounds with pride but a little annoyance... I have elephant knees, a floppy belly, bat wings, and sagging parts galore, It reminds me of alot of hard work and good choices... but it also reminds me that I still have far to go...



• Fiber is important to me... really important.



• I have a vase with a little pebble/rock for every pound I've lost... I have lots more rocks to go in... when it's time. It's really beautiful, I saw the idea on RUBY, and I decided that It was something I wanted to do as well.



• I watch HEAVY, RUBY, and many other Weight Loss survivor stories... they inspire me.



• Sometimes the mirror is more honest with me than other times.



• I am working on a scrapbook about my weight loss journey... called 1 vs 300.



• My weight can fluctuate up to 10 pounds in a day.



• Since I have been back home to Philly, I have eaten cake, candy, carbs in abundance, I haven't started back at the gym... and I haven't gained a pound and maybe even lost a little... because of 2 flights of stairs to my little loft... and alot more walking.



• I love reading your blogs and feel like I am part of your daily grind... and love having you in my daily grind.



• I am so happy to be home... and I feel like singing!

Happy Keaster to You!

I'm tempted to do bullets again, since I am the random thought queen but I will stick to basics. First and Foremost... Happy Easter! to those of you who are praising our Lord and Savior for taking our place on that cross, and also to those of you who can appreciate a day dedicated to candy and a big juicy ham. I am a Sinner...Hello Gluttony and Fornication, so I can praise Jesus with a mouthful of black jellybeans and marshmallow peeps. The best thing about today is that it's the first Easter Sunday when I will be with my family, in over a decade. I am truly blessed!

Anyway, I have come to a conclusion... The reason I fattened up in Florida was more than just my injury and lack of mobility... It was also a lack of stairs. Stairs are few and far between in Florida. Most houses are ranchers and elevators are wherever else. Well, when I went on my last cruise Jacquie told me that I should choose the stairs on the ship over the elevators... I thought, There are stairs on the ship? ... but I did notice the giant staircases next to all elevators and I chose them. It felt good. Well, Here in PA... Stairs are everywhere and sometimes, it's stairs or nothing. I was thinking, I didn't eat more, or less healthy once I moved down to Florida but I kept gaining and gaining. Now, I am jumping on and off the bus, train, EL, Subway... whatever, since Gas is so pricey and so is parking. I walk more, for need, not exercise and there are 2 flights of stairs up to my SoHo loft.(I am not living in SoHo, but it's my attic's style...LOL). I am more active, without adding in my gym time. So that could make a difference in my success! Hopefully!

I am getting back to the gym tomorrow. I haven't been able to go in about a week, since we were moving and all, but lifting heavy boxes and furniture could be my workout. I am going to check out a couple gyms, I need to find one that I really feel comfy at like my Y, in O-Town. Send good thoughts my way, the more comfortable I feel at my gym, the more I will go.

I am going to the University of Pennsylvania for a Bariatric support group on Wednesday too. A friend from high school is serious about getting a band and she's going so I decided to join her... It is band specific. Hey, I need support too, don't I ?

Last night, we went to the James Blunt Concert at the Tower theatre... It really brought back my youth... I went there for concerts all the time as a teenager, One of my friends worked there with security so he would get us in or get us a chance to meet the artists. Adam Ant touched my hand from stage once there... but I have washed it since, even though I claimed I never would. Anyway, I hadn't been there in like 12 years since we went to see the Kids in the Hall Live... and It was amazing. The theater hasn't changed much, It is classic and historic so a little dingy and worn but then so am I. We took the train there and we were there quick and home quick. Gotta love public transportation!

Easter comes but once a year... Thank Goodness!

Black Beans have alot of Protein, Right?

Bullets over Philly!

Hey, these are my weekly or sometimes weakly bullets....

• I love black jellybeans, they taste like licorice.


• Moving still sucks, but the unpacking part isn't as bad as the packing part.


• I still feel dirty, I shower and shower and can't get the truck dirt feeling off me.


• My mom's new apartment is huge... and she seems happy.


• I am going to see James Blunt with George on Saturday, taking a break from settling in...


• My Uncle and his wife are doing the family Easter Sunday this year... so there will be food, and lots of it.


• I haven't seen my nephews yet but I love that they are a little over 1/2 an hour driving away instead of a little over 1/2 a day's driving away.... and I will see them on Easter.


• I have been eating less than usual since I got here, I think I am just distracted from my routine.


• Go Flyers!


• I'm still thinking about black jellybeans... Yum!


• I don't know where all this crap is going to find a home...


• I really need to go to Walmart and get some of my regular foods in the house... so I can get back on track.


• Is it surprising to you that I haven't unpacked my scale yet?


• My niece is getting really skinny... I hope she sees how beautiful she is...


• Send me all your black jellybeans!


• It was really scary-funny to watch my Father-in-law chase my fridge down the ramp of the truck... screaming... HEY!


• I need to go to the movies, I haven't been in weeks.


• It's kinda chilly here, I feel like an idiot wearing sweatshirts and jackets while the natives walk around in shorts and flip flops. I hope I will get my native groove back soon!


• When I see people wearing my teams' gear, I still want to say Go Phils, Go Eagles, Go Flyers... and up here, everyone is wearing their gear...


• I certainly hope those black beans are in the mail....


• Have a Happy Healthy Easter everyone! Watch out for that Food Pusher... Easter Bunny!

I am alive and well... well, sort of!

Anyway, This move has been overwhelming. We are downsizing... from a 4 bedroom home to a attic in my In-law's home. I am thrilled to be back in Philly where we grew up, met, and fell in love. We can watch our nephews grow up and get back strongly on our feet, travel more and continue my quest to get healthy and maybe a little bit Fit.

Road trips... are not great for good food choices. I think I may have eaten more calories in 2 days than in all the full weeks since my surgery. But today is my first full day in the Mainline... and I have eaten good and even though I feel weak and worn out got a good workout with unloading the truck and walking. Plus all that driving burns loads of calories too, but since my scale isn't unpacked, I have no idea where I am with that.

I look forward to getting back into my workout schedule... I have to decide on a new gym and find my groove.... Philly Soul Style. I am going to my first Support Group at the University of Pennsylvania on the 27th. A friend of mine from high school is considering having a band installed so I told her I 'd love to join her for the support group. I need to find a new surgeon and UoP is top notch for Bariatrics.

When I look at all this stuff around me, I have a fear that I didn't let go of enough, I wanted to simplify my life and I still have a ton of crap. I think once I decorate and get things in their bookshelves, etc... I may take some more to Goodwill, I am determined to live more simply. I may also give my Mom more things to decorate her new apt.

I just wanted to check in with you all. I will post more later, when I get my mind back... It's out to lunch these days.

Moving... A trial of Hell on Earth.

As you know, We are moving back home this weekend... I am very excited to be near my family and friends... especially my sweet nephews. That being said.... I am losing my mind and breaking my back with this actual moving process.

I should tell you that I had become quite the Lady of Leisure in my years of disability, and now that I am more able-bodied, I am more involved in the hard work and stress. My George is the best husband that any Girl could dream of... He has taken such good care of me for the last 20 years and made my disability, a little less debilitating. We have been loading the truck for the last 36 hours with breaks for sleeping and eating but not much else. It is like a puzzle trying to maneuver all our things to fit them in this giant box. I look forward to starting the drive.... Which I never thought I'd say...

The reason why I never thought I'd say that I was looking forward to the drive is that this truck is huge... Like a 18 wheeler or semi. That's only a slight exaggeration, I assure you. I was nervous just driving it back to our house to start loading... and it's been sitting in the driveway, jetting out slightly into the street since we picked it up on Thursday...

Well, I just wanted to take a moment to share my hellish weekend with you... 2 1/2 days packing and loading.... and 2 days driving. Hopefully, on Tuesday, I will be able to just look around at the boxes and totes and say Eff it... I am going to get a cheesesteak.

Eating out... DiZneDiVa style!

Well, I eat out alot.... and since Carmen mentioned about eating out, I wanted to jump in... My favorites:

• Texas Roadhouse-Steakhouse... I can eat steak without a problem, some bandsters can't, That said. I like fried food... Quote me, Fried is only one letter from friend. My hubby and I share the fried pickles. Pickles are no to low calories and with the oil and breading, the whole basket is like 174 calories, and none of us could eat the whole basket. They are yummy with a little ranch or bistro sauce... I only tip the pickle in to use as little sauce as possible. I feel like I've been bad so I always make good choices with my entree. I usually order off the kid's menu, I get the Lil Dino steak bites which is 4 ounces of steak, cooked medium rare. I can't eat steak cooked more than that which is ok with me since I like it like that. I get broccoli for my one side. I am trying to cut back on red-meat... so I will order the kids' chicken fingers too, and I ask for them grilled instead of breaded and fried with broccoli. They will make it grilled by request. It doesn't hurt to ask, so ask... if you want. I will eat a few peanuts but i try to limit that, since they're like chips to me.

• Olive Garden- I used to love OG but post-band, not so much. I don't really eat pasta or bread anymore and the entrees that are high protein low carb are too expensive for me since I eat out alot, I do it on a budget. I order off the kids' menu alot... I get grilled chicken, it comes with broccoli and a little bit of pasta. i don't eat the breadsticks and I may have a little salad or soup... depends.

• Red Lobster- I love Red Lobster alot Post-band... I am a huge Fish girl, I love all Whitefish but my favorites are flounder, tilapia, pollock, cod, mahi mahi... Well, at Red Lobster, I love the Wood-Fired Grilled Tilapia... It is lick your plate good! I get it with broccoli, and a side of Remoulade sauce. I love the cheddar bay biscuits so once in a while I will have a bite... but most times, I don't.

• Buffets- I like Golden Corral and other places that are similar. Buffets are not easy but can be fun since variety is the spice of life. Bandsters get either a child's price or the senior's price... Ask, it will save a couple bucks since we can't eat much of the ALL YOU CAN EAT.... I look over the proteins to decide what I feel like. I usually will get a little broiled fish, some baked chicken, or turkey... I can have a little of each. I get broccoli, green beans, or califlower... or a little of each. i like to try new things, so I can decide what I like. I crave mashed potatoes since my surgery, so I will get a spoonful sometimes but not always. I can get a little salad if I feel like it, or soup. I can have a little dessert too, without eating a whole dessert. And they have several sugar free options to cut carbs. It surprises me sometimes, to not get dessert when it is freely available. but most of the time, I don't have room. Sweet tomatoes is a great buffet which is mainly salad, veggie based. I pay the child's price there and enjoy salads with meat like chicken or turkey. I pick the meaty spoonfuls, and soups with meat in them. Their soups are meaty, for sure. I love it there.

• Fast food- Chick Fila is one of my favorites, luckily their "Fried" chicken is actually healthy. I order a 4 or 6 count nugget... which they have, even though they're not on the menu. Except the kids' menu. I don't get fries, if I get a kids' meal. I will get a salad instead of fries and a bottled water instead of soda. Pollo Tropical is a great choice. I get the kids' meal with grilled chicken strips, and I get salad as my side, it comes with yummy animal crackers... I try not to eat them but usually do...LOL KFC- Grilled Chicken, usually boneless, it is delicious.

Making good decisions allows you to eat anywhere, and making mostly good choices allows you to make a few bad ones... without the guilt and deprivation of diets.

FAT is a state of mind... and apparently the state of my behind.

Yesterday, My George and I went to Universal Theme Parks in Orlando and I had a day full of NSFs... That's Non-Scale Failures, Leave it to me to have to come up with that term. I was thinking my new lean sleek more athletic bod would allow me to fit on some of the rides that I haven't been able to ride in the past... I was wrong. My new Lean Sleep More Athletic bod is still too thick and flabby to ride 3 of the rides I was hoping for and a 4th I was too fed-up to attempt. Universal Studios is not a fat friendly park, they never have been and I knew this but it was still difficult to be unable to ride 1/2 the rides I wanted. Thank Goodness for Disney and their Fat-Friendly ways... I did love seeing the new Harry Potter area and i rode the Simpsons, Men In Black and Spiderman... all of which I had been on before so I knew I could fit but I was disappointed about 3 others, The Mummy, Harry Potter's ride, and The HULK... which kept me from even attempting Rip Ride Rocket... or whatever it's called. I am talking about the humiliating outside trial seats of course... I wish I hadn't tried to ride any of them... I felt.... DEFEATED! I know what you're going say... Take it one day at a time, You've come so far, You lost more than a supermodel in this last year, You are so much more active and healthy... I have said all these things to myself. I am thrilled with my progress, most of the time but sometimes I want to be done with this lifelong fight with Obesity... NOW! Not in another year or two... Right Frickin' Now! I know that I've made a lifestyle change and it doesn't happen overnight but I need to turn up the volume. I need to work harder and cut the fat... literally. When I move next week back home to Philly, I am going to change a couple things... and retweek my routines to see if I can start losing a little faster. And keep on track a little better.... I don't need to be thin, but I want to FIT IN! I don't want to be left out again...

A day in the Life... of a perfectly imperfect Bandster.

I think my good friend Amy Sunshine(Amy W for you proper name types) had a great idea. While watching Doctor Oz's show the other day I also thought it was misleading when the lapbanders showed what they used to eat and what they now eat... So her idea was to tell all you newbies and those researching the band what a day in our lives look like... I am telling you yesterday since today was a theme park which is not at all typical... I woke up around 9am and had a EAS Carb Control Rich Dark Chocolate Protein shake and a bowl of Fiber One Honey Clusters cereal(1 cup cereal and 1/2 a cup of 1% milk) for breakfast. (325 calories, 26 grams of protein, 16 grams of dietary fiber) Went to the gym and did about 50 minutes of Strength Training and 30 minutes of interval cardio on the recumbent bike. For Lunch I had a 6 pack of Chicken Nuggets from Chick Fila(203 calories, 21 grams of protein, .8g dietary fiber) Snacks-Atkins Daybreak Apple Crisp Bar and a handful of Golden Raisins (195 calories, 11 grams protein, 8 grams dietary fiber), Dinner-Gordon's Grilled Tilapia-Signature Grilled-2 filets with green beans(182 calories, 28g protein, 2g dietary fiber) and after dinner snacks Dannon Greek yogurt- Strawberry fruit on the bottom(120 calories, 12g protein) and Skinny Cow Mint truffle Ice cream Popcicle(100 calories, 3g protein, 3g fiber)... Total calories for the day 1125, protein grams 101, Dietary Fiber Grams 29.8. I am pretty much eating constantly throughout the day but small amounts, mostly good choices. I do other protein shakes sometimes,(Like Atkins Advantage Mocha Latte shake) I also eat Chobani Greek Yogurt sometimes(although I prefer Dannon but they don't have as many flavors), I sometimes mix in some fiber one original Bran cereal in my yogurts if my fiber is too low... I try to get at least 25 grams of fiber a day and at least 95 grams of protein, I try to keep my carbs under 100 grams a day) Most of the items that I ate yesterday are regulars in my routine...

1 vs. 300

Well, I thought that would be a catchy new name for my blog... 1 vs. 300, since I am up against 300 pesky extra pounds. Now, you might be saying... but you are really only trying to lose 255 pounds to get down to 220. That is my first goal... but my doctor's goal for me is 185 and I figure if I got all the way there, Why now even it out at 175 for an even 300 pounds? And since my hubby weights 193... anything less than that would be awesome.

• I have lost 120 pounds as of this morning. Well, I saw it yesterday but I waited to confirm with today's weigh ins.


• When I eliminate 6 more of my 300, I will be able to be weighed on a regular scale for the first time in over a decade. I have weighed over 350 for that long.


• We get our moving truck in 10 days and will pack up to head home... to Philly.


• I missed an awesome girls' weekend in Idaho with my Roomies this past weekend.


• I can't wait to hug my nephews and know when I leave them that I can see them tomorrow, or the next day...


• Could one of you Northeasterners please get rid of the snow and cold to prepare for my arrival? I planned my move in Mid-April expecting Spring.


• I hate moving, packing, sorting, unpacking, and I hope to not have to do it again for a long while.


• I love that my MIL watched the Dr. Oz show today to learn more about Gastric Banding so she would understand it better...for me.


• Just because I like Coconut Shrimp, doesn't mean I like shrimp.


• My husband likes to be naked all the time in the house... and probably outside it too, if I let him.


• I can't wait to see you again, or meet you in Chicago... Please come!


• I really like peanut butter alot, I may have to detox from that next...


• Is it just me or are people's driving getting worse?


• I went to Rita's water Ice for a Slenderita fat free Ice Cream... and ended up with Chocolate Peanut butter Italian Ice... I haven't been there for so long, I didn't even know they had that....Have I mentioned my love of Peanut Butter? and you are aware of my love of Chocolate. It wasn't sugar-free but It was small like a dixie cup and it was yummy.


• When I saw myself in the mirror at the Gym, I saw a Sleek... lean, athletic machine... It was only a second or two but I think it was a premonition of the future. Or maybe just Delusions of Grandeur.


• People who can't/don't eat Pasta or Bread should stay away from Carrabbas... because their bread and pasta are delicious and their bathroom is too small for that amount of crowd the place draws...


• People really love Pasta and Bread.... and Carrabbas.


• Were you wondering if I had my finger in the Peanut butter right now?


• Kirstie Alley is amazing... I wish I could move this Less big body that gracefully. And getting up afraid a humiliating stumble like tonight, Bravo!


• I am liking random thought bullets


• I want to jump on a trampoline, eventually.


• I think Cupcake Wars is making my cupcake obsession worse... and I didn't think that was possible.


• I am beginning to think I was born a scrapbooker, otherwise I would have to admit to borderline hoarding.


• I like Golden Raisins better than regular ones.


• Dannon Greek is delicious, I like it better than Chobani and I just wish they'd come out with more flavors.


• My walls look really bare without all my photos and artwork, Is this what it's like to be a Minimalist? It's not for me.


• My George designed me a Gym Jams Playlist for my Ipod, and I burned an extra 100 calories today... Coincidence? I think not.


• I declare Mondays, Music Monday... I will pick a favorite song each week. I love all kinds of Music, and most of you know I am a huge Gleek, so the song I choose for today is one of my Gym Jams and It's a mashup Mixup of Singing in the Rain and Umbrella from Glee. Check out the video on Utube if you don't watch the show... It's so much fun!

Well, That's enough bull-shits, I mean Bullets for tonight. I would love to hear some random thought comments back... also, If I am not following your blog, please leave your URL in the comments, so I can check out your story...