Tuesday, January 8, 2013

How I'm Feeling?....

Well, I went to the hospital to have my surgery today.... I was stuck with IVs and needles, including an Epidural in my back. I was cut with 2 incisions... and the Surgeon couldn't do the Gastric Bypass because I have too much Scar Tissue from my LapBand. My Insurance doesn't pay for the Gastric Sleeve yet, but hopefully soon.... So, 

  1. I am Feeling.... Sore
  2. I am Feeling... Helpless
  3. I am Feeling... Depressed
  4. I am Feeling... Traumatized
  5. I am Feeling... Annoyed
  6. I am Feeling... Hurt
  7. I am Feeling... Beaten
  8. I am Feeling.... Fat
  9. I am Feeling... Sad
  10. I am Feeling... Alone
  11. I am Feeling... Hopeless
  12. I am Feeling....Confused
  13. I am Feeling... Incurable
  14. I am Feeling...Vulnerable
  15. I am Feeling...  Incomplete
But Most of all.... I am Feeling Sorry For Myself! Hopefully, After a good night's sleep... I will Awake with a Fresh Perspective. Until Then... Color me BLUE


  1. ah man....my heart just sank as I read this...I can only imagine the torture you must feel right now...BIG HUGS!!!!!

  2. So sorry! Hope the days to come bring a new perspective for you!

  3. Maria I am so sorry to read this. Did your surgeon not do a MRI before hand so they could see the ondition and position of your band. I know mine did just for a TT Chin up. This will all work out.

  4. I am so sorry. I have no idea how you feel, but I'm sure the emotions are tough to deal with. :(

  5. Hang in there Maria, wish I was there to give you a big hug. I know George is taking good care of you though. I'm sending all of my postive juju your way. xoxo

  6. OMG!!!! I am sooooooooo sorry, I can't even begin to say that I can feel what you are going through but I do know that if I had gone through what you've been through in the last couple of months, I certainly would feel the same way you state above. Please do not give up...you have gone through so much! I pray that your insurance will start covering the sleeve. It is recognized by so many doctors now; it is only a matter of time. If you need to talk, please let me know and I will send you my #. Ughhhhh I am feeling so down for you right now, but you are a positive person and WILL recover from this...try to take all the stuff you learned while you had the band and implement that...I am rooting for you!!!!!

  7. Holy Crap? They couldnt see that from the upper Endo? Did they warn you that this could happen? I would be so so sad too! There is no way they can do the bypass? What about a second opinion. I know you, bc I know me, and I worry that the sleeve would not work as well for you as bypass (bc I know it wouldn't for me).

    Damn. Im sorry friend.

    1. I am going to have the sleeve... and I am hoping to challenge some of my gorgeous friend Amy's Gym Goddess. I will rock the sleeve. Rani is doing incredibly well with hers. I can't be without anything or I will end up weighing a ton, literally. Your friendship is a blessing, and I know that support will help me through this next section of my journey. XOXO *M*

  8. OMG! I'm so sorry! Hang in there Maria! I'll be keepin you in my thoughts and prayers!

  9. Sending hugs. I'm so sorry that they couldn't do the bypass. I hope it's a blessing in disguise. :(

  10. OMG Maria! I am so sorry! I guess that I was really lucky. They removed my fluid about 6 months before the Surgery to remove the Band, then my Surgeon said that he wouldn't do the Bypass until at least 3 months after Band removal.

    So sad to go through all that just to awaken and find out that nothing was done! I had considered the Sleeve, but I feared that I would definitely eat around it! Who knows, I still might do it with the RNY as well, but I think that it was my best option!

    I will be praying that your Insurance starts to cover the Sleeve for you. Is there any chance that the Surgeon would reconsider the RNY after some time?

  11. Oh you poor thing! I can understand why you are feeling all of those things! Where do you go from here?

  12. Thanx Girls... I really Appreciate your support. I am happy that I will be getting the sleeve. And thrilled that I have so much love and support... XOXO *M*