Tuesday, January 8, 2013

How I'm Feeling?....

Well, I went to the hospital to have my surgery today.... I was stuck with IVs and needles, including an Epidural in my back. I was cut with 2 incisions... and the Surgeon couldn't do the Gastric Bypass because I have too much Scar Tissue from my LapBand. My Insurance doesn't pay for the Gastric Sleeve yet, but hopefully soon.... So, 
  1. I am Feeling.... Sore
  2. I am Feeling... Helpless
  3. I am Feeling... Depressed
  4. I am Feeling... Traumatized
  5. I am Feeling... Annoyed
  6. I am Feeling... Hurt
  7. I am Feeling... Beaten
  8. I am Feeling.... Fat
  9. I am Feeling... Sad
  10. I am Feeling... Alone
  11. I am Feeling... Hopeless
  12. I am Feeling....Confused
  13. I am Feeling... Incurable
  14. I am Feeling...Vulnerable
  15. I am Feeling...  Incomplete
But Most of all.... I am Feeling Sorry For Myself! Hopefully, After a good night's sleep... I will Awake with a Fresh Perspective. Until Then... Color me BLUE
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14 comments:

  1. jennxazJanuary 9, 2013 at 4:43 AM

    ah man....my heart just sank as I read this...I can only imagine the torture you must feel right now...BIG HUGS!!!!!

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  2. UnknownJanuary 9, 2013 at 4:54 AM

    So sorry! Hope the days to come bring a new perspective for you!

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  3. BarbaraJanuary 9, 2013 at 5:55 AM

    Maria I am so sorry to read this. Did your surgeon not do a MRI before hand so they could see the ondition and position of your band. I know mine did just for a TT Chin up. This will all work out.

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  4. ~Miss Lorie~January 9, 2013 at 6:49 AM

    I am so sorry. I have no idea how you feel, but I'm sure the emotions are tough to deal with. :(

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  5. JenJanuary 9, 2013 at 6:53 AM

    Hang in there Maria, wish I was there to give you a big hug. I know George is taking good care of you though. I'm sending all of my postive juju your way. xoxo

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  6. Nikki609January 9, 2013 at 7:11 AM

    OMG!!!! I am sooooooooo sorry, I can't even begin to say that I can feel what you are going through but I do know that if I had gone through what you've been through in the last couple of months, I certainly would feel the same way you state above. Please do not give up...you have gone through so much! I pray that your insurance will start covering the sleeve. It is recognized by so many doctors now; it is only a matter of time. If you need to talk, please let me know and I will send you my #. Ughhhhh I am feeling so down for you right now, but you are a positive person and WILL recover from this...try to take all the stuff you learned while you had the band and implement that...I am rooting for you!!!!!

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  7. Amy W.January 9, 2013 at 7:19 AM

    Holy Crap? They couldnt see that from the upper Endo? Did they warn you that this could happen? I would be so so sad too! There is no way they can do the bypass? What about a second opinion. I know you, bc I know me, and I worry that the sleeve would not work as well for you as bypass (bc I know it wouldn't for me).

    Damn. Im sorry friend.

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    Replies
    1. DiZneDiVaJanuary 18, 2013 at 10:45 AM

      I am going to have the sleeve... and I am hoping to challenge some of my gorgeous friend Amy's Gym Goddess. I will rock the sleeve. Rani is doing incredibly well with hers. I can't be without anything or I will end up weighing a ton, literally. Your friendship is a blessing, and I know that support will help me through this next section of my journey. XOXO *M*

      Delete
  8. TheresaJanuary 9, 2013 at 8:58 AM

    OMG! I'm so sorry! Hang in there Maria! I'll be keepin you in my thoughts and prayers!

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  9. -Grace-January 9, 2013 at 2:56 PM

    :( I'm so sorry, hun.

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  10. Catherine55January 10, 2013 at 2:16 PM

    Sending hugs. I'm so sorry that they couldn't do the bypass. I hope it's a blessing in disguise. :(

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  11. DebiJanuary 12, 2013 at 7:47 PM

    OMG Maria! I am so sorry! I guess that I was really lucky. They removed my fluid about 6 months before the Surgery to remove the Band, then my Surgeon said that he wouldn't do the Bypass until at least 3 months after Band removal.

    So sad to go through all that just to awaken and find out that nothing was done! I had considered the Sleeve, but I feared that I would definitely eat around it! Who knows, I still might do it with the RNY as well, but I think that it was my best option!

    I will be praying that your Insurance starts to cover the Sleeve for you. Is there any chance that the Surgeon would reconsider the RNY after some time?

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  12. #fatfreefloozyJanuary 16, 2013 at 3:04 AM

    Oh you poor thing! I can understand why you are feeling all of those things! Where do you go from here?

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  13. DiZneDiVaJanuary 18, 2013 at 11:02 AM

    Thanx Girls... I really Appreciate your support. I am happy that I will be getting the sleeve. And thrilled that I have so much love and support... XOXO *M*

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